The Dwarf and Elfhole

My office partner and I are enjoying our second year of sharing our digs -- not just the office space, but also the insults and cuts that are cast often between two good friends. J. is a former high school teacher that started working with me about three years ago, and last year, he and I started sharing an office. Its not the office we're in currently, and that's a completely different post altogether.

About a year ago, I decided that I wanted to grow my beard out. I first started growing a beard when I was 17, shaved it while I was in the Marines, and as soon as I could after I got out of the Corps, started growing it again. Once before, I let it just go like I am now, and that's when I was in Norway. It got pretty big and bushy then, but, I clipped it back before I came home. Since then, up until a year ago, I kept it pretty closely trimmed. A year ago, though, I decided, fuck it, it's time to have some fun with the facial hair.

J. was one of the first to notice, too. Around my birthday, he looked at me, and said, "your beard bigger?"

"Yup."

"Cool."

Now, J. is a bit over a decade my senior, and is one of those men that can't really grow facial hair. When he starts to tease me, then, I know its purely from jealously. Other people kid me about it, too, and I take it all in good stride. For example, the college provost's administrative assistant refers to me as the burly man. Another coworker asked if I was working on becoming a part-time Santa. Yeah, with the grades I gave a lot of his students, ho ho ho, motherfucker. *heh*

So, last February, J. and I got hoodwinked into going to a conference down in the Twin Cities with another coworker, B. We took B.'s ride, and I drove from Grand Forks to Clear Lake, MN. At that point, J. took over, and he looked at me and said, "okay, you need to tell me how to get to this place. You're my navigator."

Without missing a beat, I snapped back, "And you're the wind beneath my wings."

J. had to pull to the shoulder of the Interstate because he was laughing so hard. B. proclaimed that exchange the theme for the weekend.

After spending so much time together in the office, it became natural for us to start completing each other's sentences. We both enjoy breaking into the random song from time to time, the scary thing is that we often break into the same song at the same time. Others have noticed. One day, in the hall, we bumped hard and grabbed each other so we wouldn't fall (we were both called by different people at the same time), and we did a nice little hop polka in the hall, arguing as to who was the lead.

But, it was the trip in November that sealed it. Now, J. and I have done a lot of work outside of school together as well. He helped me build my bed, and I'm helping him build a new computer desk for his home office. My table saw is living in his garage right now until my garage gets a little decluttered. Anyway, we headed to a workshop about three hours from home, and on the way there, the roads were horrendous. They were halfway between sucky and shitty, and J. was driving about 45 miles an hour. Now, I forget just what he said to me, but I fired a quip right back at him. He looked over at me and said, in a voice laced heavily with insult, a single word.

"Dwarf."

J. had been saying for a few weeks how I looked like an extra from Lord of the Rings. Then, it was more like Gimli himself that I resembled. I find the greatest in humor when he makes these comments, and without batting an eyelash, I replied.

"Elfhole."

We spent five minutes on the shoulder of I-29 until he quite laughing enough to trust his driving.

*grin*

I'm good like that.